Hey guys, I had a funny idea for a post about when it's ok to use Comic-Sans. (It will be a joke, BTW)

It doesn't have to be related to comics and can be totally sarcastic or contradictory to the truth. Anyway, I have a few starting ideas but I was hoping to get some help coming up with an amazingly funny list of 100 (if possible). I was thinking it could be similar to the Chuck Norris facts website: http://www.thechucknorrisfacts.com/ If anyone can help me I'll add your link to the article when I post it on my blog. Feel free to add to it. Whatever you think is hilarious or even just spruce up what I already wrote if you think you have a better way of saying it.

What I have so far...

When to use Comic-Sans:

1. When accompanied with brail.
2. In an email, when you need to break up with your designer girlfriend or boyfriend but don't have the guts to just do it.
3. For font sizes 3pts. or smaller.
4. Anytime you use the word "Helvetica"
5. Whenever writing profanity to maximize offensiveness.
6.

Is this a dumb idea? I know you guys are funny. Help.

6. Always use when not making comics.

7. When you just need to get that logo done.

8. Your name is Vincent Connare. You made this so might as well use it proudly.
9. You're a clown.
10. It's a life and death situation!!! For some reason.
11. You're a little kid and you don't know any better.
12. When ironically making fun of the font (like this list, for example).
13. You mistook it for "Cosmic Sense".
14. You're drunk and it makes it look like the "best font ever".



I can do this all day but then I wouldn't be making any comics. That might be ironic.

Hahah Those are great. Keep going!!!!

15. If it was an accident.
16. To emphasize how smart your dumbest character is getting.
17. If your comic is wordless. (Sorry iaviv)
18. If you're a Fortune 500 company.
19. If you write Dave Gibbons asking for his permission to use it since it was based on his lettering. Good luck.
20. If on your death bed, you can't talk and the only way you can communicate is by texting your family with your final words but all your other fonts have somehow vanished.
21. If your natural handwriting looks exactly like it.

22. If you're playing the 'guess-what-letter-I'm-drawing-on-your-back-with-my-finger' game with a comatose pal.

LOL! I picked up a book yesterday and thought "that looks like THE FONT THAT SHOULD NOT BE NAMED, it's all hiddeous and awkward". I asked the author what he used and he said "it's Dave Gibbon's font". I thought "oh... I see, Dave Gibbons has messy handwriting".

LOL, I totally bought it! Poor guy, he must get so much crap for printing his comic with that font if he's that good at deflecting it.

If Dave Gibbons were dead he would be turning in his grave.
I've heard it's also based on Frank Miller's Dark Knight that came out the same year as Watchmen. Now, it doesn't look like either of them. I've checked. You can say it was based pretty much on anything and it wouldn't make any difference at all.


23. You have amnesia so naturally you forget what good taste is all about.
24. You're applying for a letterer job. The thing is... you actually want to be rejected, it's too much pressure!
25. You're writing a ransom note. You want to mess with these people as much as possible.
26. It's the end of times, the apocalypse. Everyone's a zombie and can only read Comic-Sans, everything else is like gibberish to them.
27. You're testing how typography affects the human psyche. This is a good place to start.
28. You're writing a letter to your clown friend.


The last one counts! I'm not repeating myself, this is totally different!

29. You're using invisible ink. No, the real stuff that can't be made visible. Ever.

Invisible ink! Haha

30. If you are printing it on a dot matrix printer; from the 80's.
31. If it's on a tape that will self destruct in 5 seconds.
32. If you are making a list called "When to use Comic-Sans"
33. If you are over 90 years old. I mean, come on, you earn the right to do whatever you want at that age.
34. If you want to republish your comic again in a few years with revised lettering.
35. If you are making a list of all the fonts ever made.

36. You're writing a note about the state of the company refrigerator, and don't want it to appear too angry, just passive aggressive.

37. When you want to stick it to a really crappy client that is a major pain (Papyrus may also be used)

38. If i ever teach an entry level type class, i'm going to have the students do an experimental type exercise with comic-sans...i believe in theory, that something good could come out of it. hahaha or not.

39. If you want to see an elitist graphic designers' pathologically disproportionate anger towards a font.

40. If you're a homicide detective investigating a murder that took place at a party with 100 people and you know that a graphic designer has committed the murder but you don't know which attendee is a graphic designer, make a sign using THE FONT THAT SHOULD NOT BE NAMED and ask everyone what they think of it. The graphic designer will be the only person who has a problem with it.

Highly unlikely yet an extremly good course of action!

Yeah, that last one's pretty genius, CWrann! I so want to see that as a plot in some show/book/comic.

Haha! Great stuff. If we can get 50 total then I'll try to make a post out of it.

Ask and ye shall receive. I'm going to do a short webcomic with this idea. I haven't begun it, it could take days or weeks or months but I'm going to get the whole thing done and up in one long page. (y'know the kind that you keep scrolling down.) People get are so, what's the word... passionate about THE FONT THAT SHOULD NOT BE NAMED this might give me the opportunity to make something that would actually do good on reddit and stumble. Again, I don't know when it will be finished but I'm calling dibs right now.

@CWrann - Go for it.


41. You're trying to be "hip" and "cool" with the kids.
42. The Bible told you so. A Bible written in Comic-Sans. The worst Bible...
43. You're writing notes to yourself. No one will ever see this other than you so there's nothing to worry about.

44. When you're making an episode of South Park with comic book still montages. (I'm not kidding. See for yourself: http://www.southparkstudios.com/full-ep ... on-friends)

--M

http://www.comicsanscriminal.com/

when to use THE FONT THAT SHOULD NOT BE NAMED ;3